by editor | May 26, 2012 | Lifestyle
The Online Dating Double Standard: How Fear Can Prevent Dating Success
Many people go online in search of their elusive soul mate, only
to find all of the wrong people on the other end of the meeting.
Many women think that they are alone in this outcome, but it
happens to guys too.
Women have met so many men online, who only seem interested in a
roll in the hay, that they have built defenses that may stand in
the way of their ultimate success in dating and lifelong
happiness. The ladies always tend to believe that they are the
only ones that get the short end of that stick, but it just is
not true – it really does happen to guys too.
My best friend recently re-entered the dating game, after his
wife of ten years decided that she wanted to play the field
rather than to stay committed to her husband and her vows. He is
a good Christian man, who is only looking for the next Mrs.
Smith. Yet, all of the ladies he has been meeting online are only
in the game for one thing – a roll in the hay.
Girls, you are not alone.
Dating on the Internet is just like dating in real life, with
only minor differences. In person, one can look into the eyes of
their potential date to see if there is any real interest. In
real life, one can read the body language of their potential
date, to see if the interest is real and the intent is good. But,
if you were to accept a date with someone met online, then you
would actually have to agree to that first date in order to get
that one-on-one to measure the interest and intent of your date.
Men and women both fool themselves, by believing that they can
read the person at the other end of the conversation, simply by
asking questions and reading the written answers. It is not that
simple, especially if the other end of the conversation is only
interested in night of passion, because the guy only interested
in a one-night stand will likely tell you exactly what you want
to hear. If he is willing to lie to you to get what he wants,
then he will not be the kind of person you want to meet anyway.
But, here is the rub. Many people, men and women alike, feel that
the most effective way to avoid the one-night stand type of date,
is to demand a commitment of a long-term relationship from the
person with whom they are speaking.
Would you commit to buying a car you called about, sight unseen,
and without having at least looked at or driven the vehicle
first?
You certainly wouldn’t, would you?
So, why do you want someone else to commit to a long-term
relationship, sight unseen, without first meeting that someone?
Commitment runs two ways. If I were to commit to a long-term
relationship with someone I had never before met, then I would
expect the person forcing the commitment to approach the
relationship with the exact same commitment for me as I had given
to them. Just as a marriage relationship requires two people to
work together towards the same ends, any commitment undertaken
will also require both parties to invest the same care of concern
for the promise.
But, the person demanding that kind of commitment before our
first date is just as likely to find one hundred reasons not to
go out with me on a second date. It just goes with the territory.
It is just basic human behavior that assures me of that outcome.
The person demanding a commitment from me, without having first
met me, is a person who fears what I might want from them. But,
when the fear is so strong as to demand an upfront commitment for
a date, then the fear will most assuredly prevent the date from
leading to greater things.
This is the very reason why I choose to only date women who are
willing to approach a date with “No Strings Attached.”
“No Strings Attached” gives me the liberty to determine if I
like the person enough to go out with them a second time. And
“No Strings Attached” gives her the ability to decide on her
own free will if she will want to go out with me on a second
date. “No Strings Attached” permits both my date and myself to
go out on a date, without fear and without pressure to make
things work.
With no expectation of a second date assumed, then both my date
and myself are free to explore one another, to see if there is a
real future potential for the relationship.
Ladies. I know that I am looking for a long-term relationship,
and one day, I might be willing to invite my girlfriend to become
my wife. “No Strings Attached” should never be viewed, as “I
only want a roll in the hay.” Instead, “No Strings Attached”
means that I would like to get to know you a bit better, before I
agree to any kind of long-term or committed relationship with
you.
Just as I want the chance to get to know you before I make a
commitment to you, you should want the same from me.
Hit me up, if you live in my neck of the woods. I am single, and
I make a real good living. I am looking for a long-term
relationship, with the potential of marriage, and I may truly be
looking for someone exactly like you. But until you can put away
your fear and agree to go on a date with no strings attached,
then you and I will never know what could have been.
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. Our no-strings-attached dating site has become a popular
online adult dating destination, due to its large membership
base of people looking for relationships of all kinds. Learn
more at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 26, 2012 | Lifestyle
GROWING GOOD CORN
Have you noticed how all of life is connected? You probably know
about the relationship between honey ants (farm ants) and aphids.
The ants can’t seem to get enough of the tasty honey dew left behind
by aphids, those tiny sap-sucking insects probably living in your
garden. These two insects have a fascinating relationship. In
exchange for all the sugary treats aphids deposit on leaves, the
ants wage fierce battle against wasps, beetles and spiders that try
to dine on aphids for lunch. As those aphids keep their ant friends
happy, the ants keep their aphid buddies alive. Everyone wins,
except the plants, of course.
The ants do better because of the aphids. The aphids do better
because of the ants. It’s a relationship called mutualism, and the
rest of us could probably take a lesson. People, too, succeed best
when they help others out.
James Bender, in his book How to Talk Well (New York: McGraw-Hill
Book Co., Inc., 1994), illustrates how it benefits to everyone when
we mutually help each other. He relates a story of a farmer who grew
award-winning corn. Each year he entered his best corn in the
regional fair where it won a blue ribbon.
One year a newspaper reporter interviewed him to learn about how he
grew blue-ribbon corn year after year. The reporter discovered
something interesting. He learned that the farmer actually shared
his best seed corn with his neighbors.
“How can you afford to share your best seeds with your neighbors
when they are entering corn in competition against yours each year?”
the reporter asked.
“Why sir,” said the farmer, “didn’t you know? The wind picks up
pollen from the ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If
my neighbors grow inferior corn, cross-pollination will steadily
degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must
help my neighbors grow good corn.”
It’s a simple and important principle. His corn cannot improve
unless his neighbor’s corn also improves. He cannot succeed simply
by watching out for Number One. He succeeds best by helping his
neighbors succeed. That’s mutualism.
And I am aware that it goes for me, too. Do I want to succeed? Then
I must help others to succeed.
Do I want to live in peace and harmony? Then I need to help my
neighbors also live in peace, and the very peace they experience
will add to my own.
Do I want to live meaningfully and well? Then I should help to
enrich the lives of others, for my own happiness and well-being is
bound up in the lives I touch.
In other words, if I want to grow good corn, I need to help my
neighbors grow good corn. Call it mutualism. Call it a principle of
success. Call it a law of life. I only know that none of us truly
wins until we all win.
– Steve Goodier
__________
Find Steve Goodier here: http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/.
Newsletter: http://LifeSupportSystem.com.
by editor | May 24, 2012 | Lifestyle
Online Dating Is A Difficult Process That Offers Some Rewards
Many people who are on the dating scene turn to the online dating
websites to find new friends and lovers. But that road is a hard
one that can occasionally bring those with great patience – great
rewards.
Beyond everything else, patience is required of anyone who is
pursuing friends, lovers or mates in the real world and online.
When I do the dating thing in the real world, I find several
opportunities to talk to the person in whom I am interested. Then
after a few meets, I pop the big question, asking for a date.
Then date night comes along and it may work, and it may not, but
more frequently all seems well early, only to fall apart at a
later date.
Folks, online dating comes with all the same pitfalls as offline
dating. You advertise yourself, you find people whom you may be
interested, you try to talk it up, and then the first date comes.
That first date may work and it may not.
In the end, online dating is much the same as offline dating,
with a few more benefits and pitfalls thrown in to frustrate the
person seeking a date.
The Differences Between The Online And Offline Experience
The biggest difference between the online and offline dating
experience is a benefit that comes from it.
Benefits Of Online Dating
With online dating, you get to be introduced to people with whom
you may have never had the opportunity to meet in person –
usually due to different lifestyles and different locations.
With online dating, you also have the ability to sort through the
profiles of hundreds or thousands of people to narrow your list
to your best matches more quickly.
Shortcomings Of Online Dating
When you meet someone you like in person and you say hi, he or
she will usually say hi back. For every 20 emails sent out, as
few as 2 or 3 may respond back.
Some online daters have defined this as the difference between
“talkers” and “doers”. Many point out that most people online
only want to talk about meeting, but when it comes down to it,
they will be unwilling to take the “action” step.
This actually happens in one of two ways. First is when you send
out an email and no one ever responds. The second is when you
actually set up a date, only to be stood up.
Let’s be honest about why this happens.
So many people have heard horror stories about people who have
met strangers online, only to have the meet go horribly bad. Yes,
the criminal element hangs out online as well as at the local
mall.
Ladies fear the criminal predators, and the guys should fear the
fake profile predators who are always working towards asking for
money to be sent for a needed emergency expense.
The one time I ran into the fake profile predator, I should have
known when she could not talk intelligently about her hometown. I
knew the gig was up when she started professing her love after
only a few conversations. And the gig was finally up, when this
woman who supposedly made about three times as much money as
myself needed help to pay for her babysitter in some far off
state.
The trick to ensuring your safety is to always make your first
date in a public place. That way, if things go badly on that
first date, then you can seek assistance from other people if
necessary. You can even ask the cashier to call the police out to
help escort you to your car.
Unfortunately, many people go so far as to set up a date in a
public place, but when the scheduled date time arrives, they
simply do not show up. Many of the people who got stood up were
good, honest people, but the person who stood them up will never
be able to find that out, because they never met the person whom
they agreed to meet for that first date.
Fear Is The Greatest Demotivator
When dating online, the opportunities are available for some
great people to meet and get together, but too often, people let
the fear of contact stand in the way of letting people come
together. The fear of responding to an email is the greatest
threat to the successful fulfillment of one’s relationship
desires, but also the fear of actually meeting someone in person
will prevent even people who have chatted online for a long time
from coming together.
I am always amazed when I think back to my friend Lisa, who
chatted with a guy online for more than one year, before the two
of them met. And then they dated for several months when he moved
to her hometown. They are still married eight years later. With
so many things that could go wrong in the online dating
experience, it is nice to know that there are success stories
that we can share.
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. Our no-strings-attached dating site has become a popular
online adult dating destination, due to its large membership
base of people looking for relationships of all kinds. Learn
more at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 20, 2012 | Lifestyle
Getting Past First Base In The Dating Game
http://www.nsadatingsite.com
This is going to sound cheesy, but I am going to share it with
you anyway.
For years, the first date was the worst part of the dating
process for me and my date.
She and I were often uncomfortable on our first meeting, and it
was a struggle to get through the evening to the point of comfort
between my date and myself.
One of my female friends shared with me an idea that she had come
across years before, and when I tried it for myself, it changed
most of my first dates from a nervous uncomfortable experience
into a fun and engaging evening.
Take Pen And Paper On Your First Date
In most cases, I will have talked to the person I am meeting once
or twice, before we go on the actual “first date”. So, to a
point, we are somewhat comfortable with each other. But, I am
always nervous on that first date anyway, and so is she.
It is not uncommon to be uncomfortable on that first date,
because as human beings, we want the other person to like us, as
much as we think we like them.
It is that fear of rejection that causes the most nervousness on
that first dinner date, and my friend forever changed that
experience for me to the positive, due to what I am about to tell
you right now.
Pen and paper?
Oh yeah…
It never fails. We sit down to order dinner, then we are never
sure where the conversation is going to go next.
When I feel that first twinge of uncertainty in the conversation,
I reach in my pocket and put a pen on the table in front of her.
I let curiosity drive the moment.
She is usually very confused by the ball-point pen, and she looks
at me in a quizzical manner.
I just smile.
Then I reach in my pocket and get a piece of paper. I reach
across the table and put the paper in front of her, then I make
eye contact, and respond to her confusion with another smile.
Then I place pen and paper in front of myself.
Only after I have got my own pen and paper on the table do I
speak.
I usually say, “Humor me. It will be fun.”
She will usually agree.
Then I will say, “I know you have questions, and sometimes it is
easier to put them on paper than it is to ask them in person.”
I will follow that with, “I am pretty sure that there is at
least one question about me that you might be too nervous to ask
me. If so, write it down on the paper, and I will do the same
with the question I have for you that I might be too nervous to
ask.”
Take Notes
Take notice of the reaction offered by the other person.
The body language will say more than the words that come from the
mouth.
I generally see one of three responses from the person I am with:
1) A grunt of dissatisfaction and a roll of the eyes. This means
that very likely, the date will end after dinner, and you will
never see her again.
2) A sparkle in the eye, and she will pick up the pen and begin
to write. This could be very interesting. You will be surprised
at the depth of some of the questions asked.
3) She will push the paper aside and begin to speak. Ah yes…
This one is feisty… She is not easily intimidated, and she
certainly will not be afraid to ask you ANY questions. In this
instance, she will quickly ask the most personal questions that
she could ever think to ask on a first date.
The Point Of This Exercise
As someone on a first date, we are both trying to sell ourselves
to the other person as someone with whom they should want to
spend more of their time.
As someone who has worked in sales, I know that successful sales
people don’t focus on what is in it for themselves, but instead,
they focus on answering all of the questions most important to
the other party, in an effort to help them make a good decision.
The point of this exercise is to open the communication channels,
so that both of you will be willing to dive into those very
important questions that you will need answered to decide if this
dating prospect is right for you.
If at the end of that first date, you have successfully
eliminated someone from your shopping list, you will be ahead of
the game. Most people don’t figure that out that someone is a
bad match until they have gone on two or three dates.
The pen and paper is simply a tool designed to open the
communication channels with the other person.
It is never necessary to actually write anything on your piece of
paper, unless the other person starts writing.
In order to ease the willingness to ask and answer questions, I
always make my first question somewhat silly. My goal with
selecting a humorous or silly first question is to “lessen the
tension” in the conversation and to create a “feeling of fun”
in the experience.
Even if I never go out with her again, I want her to tell her
friends that her date with me “was fun.”
Spice Up Your Love Life With Pen And Paper
Always take two pens and two sheets of paper with you when you go
on a date.
If you never have to use them, that might be a good sign for your
second date.
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. In our minds, “No Strings Attached” simply means,
“Let’s get to know one another before we start making any
commitments to one another.” To explore No Strings Attached
Dating, please visit the NSA Dating Site at:
http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 19, 2012 | Lifestyle
JUAN OF THE DEAD
DVD Release date: 4th June 2012
DVD RRP: £15.99 Cert: 15
“Hello, Juan of the Dead…We kill your loved ones…!”
Following in the witty and gory footsteps of Shaun of the Dead, comes Cuba’s first full-length horror film, JUAN OF THE DEAD!
JUAN OF THE DEAD tells the blood-drenched tale of a slacker who decides to save Cuba from an invasion of cannibalistic zombies. As the zombies turn Havana into a gory circus of flying limbs and severed heads, the nightly news anchors continue to calmly assert the government line, that the attacks are not the work of the undead but dissidents in the pay of the United States.
Scattered with allusions to traumatic moments in Cuba’s recent history, this is a zombie film with real satirical bite.
For check discs, competitions and further press information please contact
Chris Boyd – 0207 535 7309 / [email protected]
by editor | May 19, 2012 | Lifestyle
PIGGY
DVD Release date: 21st May 2012
DVD RRP: £15.99 Cert: 18
Tough, shocking and utterly compelling, PIGGY is a dark and brutal tale of revenge and retribution on the mean streets of London.
When his brother is murdered Joe (Martin Compston – The Disappearance of Alice Creed, The Damned United) finds solace in an old family friend, Piggy (Paul Anderson – Sherlock Holmes, The Firm, The Sweeney). Piggy helps Joe to cope with his grief, intent on saving him and helping him get justice for his brother’s killing.
But as their friendship grows Joe finds himself in an increasingly dangerous world of violence and revenge. Soon Joe’s life begins to collapse around him as he starts to question who Piggy really is, culminating in a brutal, disastrous climax that will stay with you forever.
With an electrifying performance from Paul Anderson in the title role, PIGGY signals the arrival of director Kieron Hawkes as a major new force in gritty British cinema.
For check discs, competitions and further press information please contact
Chris Boyd – 0207 535 7309 / [email protected]
by editor | May 19, 2012 | Lifestyle
How To Avoid The Pitfalls, Wrong Turns, Broken Hearts Of Online Dating
Copyright (c) 2009-2012 Lance Metzger
As an experienced online dater, I feel qualified to help you avoid
pitfalls, wrong turns, broken hearts, and the general
catastrophes associated with internet wooing.
When you join your first online dating community, you will be
required to fill in personal information. Please be honest. You
are shorter and fatter than you think.
However, you have to be true to yourself too. Do not embellish
your life just because you think that is what the opposite sex
wants to hear. If you create a fake persona, you will regret it
and look like a liar.
Warning: Prepare To Be Overwhelmed!
After signing up, uploading your picture and answering personal
questions, you will be bombarded with images of single people all
wanting to be friends with you. It is a heady experience, but it
isn’t real.
* Think of online dating as “an Ebay for your heart.” Yeah,
there is a lot of stuff on there, but you don’t need it all.
It’s like going to the mall with unlimited credit. Take a deep
breath and remember that these are people, not things to be
purchased.
* Take it slow. Don’t act like the greedy kid in Willie Wonka.
You are way better than that. Remember that the person you pick
to correspond with is also connecting with other people. So, do
yourself a favor and don’t tell all your friends about this
great guy/gal you met. Chances are your new “mate” might not be
around in three days and you will look like a desperate loser.
* Keep in mind that this is a “dating” website and some people
are looking to date many people as possible because, after all,
they paid for it.
* Take your time to correspond and build up a friendship before
you agree to meet someone in person. In the car business,
salespeople encourage you to take a test drive to promote in you
a feeling of “ownership.” If you want a shot at more than just
a string of one time coffee dates, you have to do the same. You
need to become “real” to the person you are interested in.
Write. Text. Whatever. Let your potential partner see you as a
person. Let a friendship grow naturally so when you finally meet
it is with a sense of anticipation, not dread. A date will be
less likely to dump you on the spot if they are eager to meet you
despite your shortcomings, and you will be more likely to
overlook their receding hairline or less-than-perfect abs.
Follow All The Safety Rules
Meet in a public place, let a friend know where you will be, and
don’t give out personal contact information until you are sure
that your date is reasonably trustworthy. Bad things don’t
happen very often, but they do happen.
Don’t believe everything your date tells you. Caveat Emptor –
Buyer Beware.
Be financially savvy. Dating sites are in this for the money.
They offer you the “convenience” of debiting your checking
account or credit card every month. Stay aware of when this
deduction will occur, or even keep a calendar specifically for
this purpose. Cancel your membership if you feel like you have
met someone special and no longer need the service, or if you
feel like this just isn’t working out for you.
Do not let your naysaying friends talk you out of this. In the
past, “computer dating” had a negative connotation; happily, I
believe that is changing. Users now realize that people on a
dating site are busy professionals who don’t like meeting
potential partners in a more traditional way (i.e., bars). The
men aren’t creepy weirdos and the women aren’t chubby
introverts….well, at least, not all of us.
Finally, be realistic. You will never meet the perfect person and
you will never be the perfect person. Relax. Readjust your
expectations and you and your date will have much more fun.
That’s what its all about, isn’t it?
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. Our no-strings-attached dating site has become a popular
online adult dating destination, due to its large membership
base of people looking for relationships of all kinds. Learn
more at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 19, 2012 | Lifestyle
When Commitment Seems A Bit Too Much Trouble
Copyright (c) 2011-2012 Lance Metzger
The nuclear family (man and wife, plus 2.2 kids) is a fantasy
that some people want to chase, and while there is nothing wrong
with that, it is not the right relationship dynamic for some
people.
Divorced And Living Together
My mother divorced my dad in 1985. He remarried in 2000, but she
remains unmarried to this day.
That is not to say that she is alone… In fact, she has been
living with the same fellow since 1989.
If you ask her “when” she plans to marry, she will hurl a load
of angry words in your direction.
But, if you ask her “why” she is not yet married, she will tell
you in no uncertain terms that she will never marry again, and
definitely not to the jerk she is with now. LOL
Her “why” is simple. You “cannot trust a man to keep his word
about anything.” LOL again.
If you ask me, it has nothing to do with whether the men in her
life keep their word about anything. Instead, by staying
unmarried, she is keeping her life simple. And if she and
whomever she is with decide to break the relationship bond, then
not having to get a divorce makes the process much easier and
without complications.
I don’t usually share personal stories about my family with my
readers, but in this case, I made an exception.
I made an exception in this case for two reasons: you probably
will never meet my mother or be able to track her down, AND her
story perfectly demonstrates how relationships can be more
complicated than they appear on the surface.
Divorced and Living Apart, But Still Dating
There is another couple I know, whose kids I went to school with
when I was younger. I have always got on well with them, and we
kept in touch after I grew up.
In their case, they divorced about the same time my parents
divorced — over 25 years ago.
But every time I see them, they are together, on a date.
One day, curiosity got the best of me. I asked them why they
still keep different homes if every time I see them they are
together. She laughed at my question.
The two of them explained that while they enjoy the company of
the other, most of the time, they grate on the other one’s
nerves if they are together too much.
So after 20 years of marriage, 5 years of dating other people,
and 20 more years of dating each other, they have come to the
conclusion that it is best to live in different houses and go on
several dates a week.
When they start to tire of the other, they stop seeing each other
for a little while.
When they are ready to start dating again, the one who broke it
off previously will call the other one on the phone.
After a couple phone calls, they will rekindle their dating
relationship. And I will begin to see them out on the town
together for dinner and such again.
Friends With Benefits
My sister has a relationship very similar to that of my moms.
She and her husband ended their marriage after only twelve years.
I can almost understand the hatred she has for men now, but not
completely.
Yeah, her husband was a jerk of super-hero proportions, but I
could almost understand why he acted in such a vile manner
because she treated him like yesterday’s garbage.
Nevertheless, that marriage was one that was made in hell. And it
ended much later than it should have.
When it all came to its brutal end, he bought tens of thousands
of dollars of stuff in her name, ruining her credit forever. When
the judge decided he needed to give her his car as part of the
settlement, he took out all of the parts necessary for the
vehicle to operate the vehicle.
It took my sister six years to gather all of the parts necessary
to start the vehicle again.
Can I say vicious?
My sister decided that she liked intimacy, but she certainly
wasn’t going to let another man ever “tell her what to do.”
For years, she had several “friends” with whom she carried a
“friends with benefits” relationship.
After several boyfriends, she finally settled down with one poor
chap, who she runs through the ringer regularly.
I cannot tell you how many phone calls I have received, my wife
and my brother have received, from my sister’s current live-in
boyfriend, with him crying on the other end of the line, because
my sister is being mean to him and threatening to end the
relationship.
All I can tell him is to lay down to take the abuse, grow some
balls and stand up to her once in a while, or move on to another
woman who will treat him better. LOL
In his case, I suspect he was much better off when he had a
“friends with benefits” relationship with my sister, instead of
a live-in boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.
The Nuclear Family Is Dead
I do say that tongue-in-cheek, because my brother does have a
nuclear-family relationship, with a wife and 3 kids, but he is
the only one left in our family who does.
As far as I am concerned, I am happy to remain a bachelor on the
prowl.
Maybe in a few years, I will grow up and accept the standard
definition of a relationship as a relationship I want in my own
life. But I am almost 40. Sometimes I think that if I haven’t
done it yet, I probably never will.
Just because most people on this earth choose the nuclear-family
relationship does not mean that it is the perfect relationship
dynamic for everyone on the planet.
Let’s face it. Commitment is not the perfect solution for
everyone, and it never will be.
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. In our minds, “No Strings Attached” simply means,
“Let’s get to know one another before we start making any
commitments to one another.” To explore No Strings Attached
Dating, please visit the NSA Dating Site at:
http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 17, 2012 | Lifestyle
With an article title like this, one might assume that I am ready
to tell you some extraordinary news about a new dating
environment. Sure, the Internet has introduced one more way for
people to meet, but does that actually change the dating scene?
Interestingly, a friend of mine met his current wife online, but
not from across country, rather from across town. The two of them
lived just five miles apart. Jokingly, we have talked about it
from the standpoint of “you could have met, if only you had been
willing to get out more.” But it was not that easy. Sure, in
theory they probably could have met when they were out and
running around, but if you talk to both and ask them the places
they go and the people they know, the chances of actually having
met were entirely unlikely.
He is a Baptist and she is a Catholic. He is a blue-collar
worker, and she works for a dentists’ office. He goes to
football games and hangs with his friends, and she used to go to
the bar with the girls. Although they both lived in the same
small town and graduated from the same high school, none of his
friends had ever met her, and none of her friends had ever met
him or his friends.
The two of them were so close, and yet so far apart from one
another.
The Internet was instrumental in bringing the two together. They
were introduced to one another through their respective personal
profiles on dating websites. After a couple of exchanged emails,
they turned first to Yahoo Chat, and then they orchestrated a
personal meet for dinner at a local restaurant. I guess you can
say the rest is history.
After a nine-month courtship, the two were married, and they have
been married now for two years.
Lessons To Be Learned
Ah yes, I am one of the guys who write about online dating. So, I
got the idea to start asking questions. I wanted to know what if
anything could have impacted this hookup in a negative way. Now
and again, I will ask a question and wish later that I had just
kept my mouth shut. In a way, this was one of those situations,
and you will see why in a minute.
Both indicated that a picture on a profile is absolutely
essential. Neither was willing to talk to anyone who hid behind a
computer on the Internet. Had either one not included a picture,
neither would have responded to the others’ email.
Both had been doing the online dating thing for a couple years.
So, both had scars from the experience.
She said that one should never lie in a profile. She said that
when she chatted guys online or met them in person, she was keen
to listen to everything she was told. She was looking for
discrepancies between what was said in chat, in person and in the
profile. She said that when she first started the online dating
thing, she did not pay much attention to those things, but she
later found that these little red flags were a good indication of
bigger red flags that she would not want to discover later.
Both suggested one of my standard pieces of advice was completely
valid. I have always said that we should get to know one another
a bit better, before we start making commitments to one another.
She said that guys, who were quick to jump into a commitment,
were not only nerdy, but also desperate for a good reason. He
said that girls were quick to declare love or commitment usually
turned out to be scammers looking to make a quick buck. He said
that within days of the first declaration of love, she would
always be asking for money, and she would pitch a fit if you told
her no, after all she would say, the two of you shared something
special.
She said there was two emails that she dreaded receiving from
guys. She said any email that employed cheesy pick up lines would
not be answered ever. She said that if I guy wanted her
attention, he would need to give some thought to his emailed
words. Second, she said that if she wanted to see a guy’s male
part, she would invite him to her house for the night. She did
not want to see him in an email message.
He said there was two emails that he also dreaded receiving. He
did not want to hear “I love you” at all, nor did he want to be
spoken to in a condescending way. I asked him what he perceived
to be “condescending”. He said words like, “sweetie”,
“dear” and “honey” were immediate turn-offs, as he perceived
those women to be professionals looking to get paid for their
dates.
All Went Well To This Point, And Then…
You know I am the type of person who is not easily embarrassed.
The interview had been going well, and then I asked the wrong
question to the wrong person. And it all changed, just like that.
I asked my friend and his wife whether they had ever got together
with someone just for fun, like a one-night-stand type
arrangement. Both had said yes, and then I regretted having asked
the question. My friend’s wife indicated that she had one real
good “friend with benefits”, and as a single guy, I might enjoy
some of the activities they liked doing.
If I had stopped here, then everything might have been all right,
but I asked what she meant.
Immediately, the alarm went off in my brain signaling too much
information! I turned beet red and she laughed. And to this day,
I have never lived down that moment in time.
How Dating Has Changed In The 21st Century
Copyright (c) 2008-2012 Lance Metzger
NSA Dating Site
http://www.nsadatingsite.com
by editor | May 17, 2012 | Lifestyle
CHECK IT OUT
Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town’s morals recently
accused George, a local man, of having a drinking problem because
she noticed his pickup truck outside the town’s only bar one
morning. After all, she reasoned, it was a logical assumption.
George stared at her for a moment and said nothing. Later that
evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left
it there all night.
Why is it that so many of our logical assumptions are just plain
wrong? And why do we want to act as if they must be true?
In an age long before the Internet, a young American at a banquet
found himself seated next to the eminent V. K. Wellington Koo, a
Chinese diplomat. Completely at a loss as to what to say to someone
from such a different culture, this young man ventured, “Likee
soupee?” After all, he assumed, don’t all Chinese speak in broken
English?
Mr. Koo smiled and nodded. Later when called upon to speak,
Wellington Koo delivered an eloquent talk in exquisite English, sat
down while the applause was still resounding, turned to the young
man and whispered, “Likee speechee?
Another assumption that was completely wrong. And I can relate. I
regularly assume things and act as if they must be true.
Do you know one of the reasons why red roses are so popular? Men
keep buying them. They ASSUME that all women prefer red roses when
flowers are in order. And when asked their partner’s favorite color
of rose, men usually say it’s red.
But what do the women say? When women are asked what color of rose
is their favorite, they are more likely to answer that they prefer
yellow, white, black, peach or lavender. And when asked what kind of
flowers they would prefer to receive from that special person, the
answer is generally not roses at all. Try daisies, tulips or
gardenias. The age-old assumption that most women like red roses
best is simply not true.
Sometimes I think it has taken way too long, but I’m learning to ask
about these things I always KNEW were absolutely true. At least I
assumed so. When my wife is silent, I’ve always assumed she was
angry with me. But now I’m learning to ask. And I’m discovering that
her aloofness sometimes actually comes from the fact that she is
worried about something not related to me at all.
Assumptions. We all make them. They’re too often wrong and can
easily get us into trouble.
So here is what I’ve learned: when in doubt, check it out. And if
I’m not in doubt, I still check it out. I’m sure I know what she
likes? I check it out. I believe I know what the silence is all
about? I check it out. It’s only logical? I still check it out.
We may think we know. But what we know may not be so. Best to check
it out.
This may sound simplistic, but I am always amazed how often we are
in distress over things we assume to be true. Yet nobody has checked
them out. And I also know that when I check my assumptions out, I
can expect to be surprised.
– Steve Goodier
__________
Find Steve Goodier here: http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/.
Newsletter: http://LifeSupportSystem.com.
by editor | May 17, 2012 | Lifestyle
AUDI STAR CREATION 2012 HAS ITS TOP 12
Fashion designers from 7 countries make the cut, including Japan, Singapore and South Korea; scramble to ready collections for the May 14 runway showdown begins
7 March 2012, Singapore – The 12 aspiring fashion stars who will face off on the runway at Audi Star Creation 2012 have been picked from over 250 submissions for the regional fashion design competition. The strongest showing this year came from South Korea, which produced four finalists. Singapore and Malaysia have two finalists each, and China, Indonesia, Japan and Thailand complete the seven countries that will be represented at the finals.
The 12 finalists for Audi Star Creation 2012 are:
Liang Wang, 27, China
Natalia Kiantoro, 22, Indonesia
Tatsuya Tsukahara, 24, Japan
Ling Siu Gin, 21, Malaysia
Vincent Wong, 22, Malaysia
Eugenice Chen, 20, Singapore
Jaslin Ong, 21, Singapore
Kim Mina, 24, South Korea
Kim Soo-Jeong, 25, South Korea
Kim Yong Woo, 27, South Korea
Ko Youngji, 32, South Korea
Soravit Kaewkamon, 23, Thailand
Singapore is fielding this year’s youngest finalist – Temasek Polytechnic Apparel Design and Merchandising student Eugenice Chen, 20. The oldest contender comes from Korea – 32-year-old Ko Youngji. Details of the collections that all 12 will present on the runway are appended.
Aspiring designers from around the region were challenged to come up with six original, creative and commercially viable designs based on the theme, “Fashion Without Frontiers”. The competition was open to designers between 16 and 35 with less than two years of experience in the fashion industry, and after an intense month of judging, these 12 have been chosen to transform their ideas into catwalk-ready collections.
The final face-off takes place at the Asia Fashion Exchange’s Tent@Orchard on May 14. Three of the 12 winners stand to walk away with a $10,000 cash prize from Audi Singapore, a one-year internship with leading fashion retailer FJ Benjamin and the chance to develop a capsule collection that will be launched at Audi Star Creation 2013. Of the three, the one whose collection best embodies Audi’s design spirit of innovation, technology and progression will receive the Audi Young Designer Award (AYDA) – an additional $10,000 cash prize. This is the third time the AYDA is being presented.
Three-time Audi Star Creation judge and Vice-President of the Textile and Fashion Federation (Singapore), Mr David Wang, says this year’s judging was significantly harder given the sheer number of entries and the rising standards of submissions. This year saw a record number of 255 entries from 13 countries.
“The theme was deliberately chosen to allow for a wide interpretation, but we were surprised at how far some designers were able to push it while still infusing their collections with both personal and cultural styles. This year, we’re going to be treated to everything from military-inspired womenswear to bold and unorthodox draping. It is going to be quite spectacular,” said Mr Wang.
Audi Singapore, which has increased its stake this year in Star Creation to be the competition’s presenting sponsor, will again also be presenting the Audi Young Designer Award to one of the winners.
Mr Reinhold Carl, Managing Director of Audi Singapore, said: “Since 2010, we have kept an eye on the winners of Star Creation to give out the Audi Young Designer Award. This goes to the designer who best embodies the progressive spirit of our brand in their designs, and the past winners of the award, Daniel Ngoo and Hiroyuki Watanabe, have wowed us with distinctive twists in their work. I am most excited to see how these qualities will be embodied in the collections of this year’s participants.”
by editor | May 17, 2012 | Lifestyle
Austrian base jumper visits UK following successful completion of 71,000ft. test jump last month
LONDON, UK – WEDNESDAY 25th – THURSDAY 26th APRIL 2012: Felix Baumgartner, the Austrian BASE jumper aiming to break the speed of sound during freefall from the edge of space, has arrived in London as he makes final preparations for his record attempt later this year in Roswell, New Mexico, USA.
Fresh from the successful completion of a 71,581 ft. test flight last month, Felix now has his sights set on his final jump (120,000 ft.) which will see him attempt to break the 52-year-old world record for the highest ever freefall.
Joining him on his London visit is Colonel USAF (Retired) Joe Kittinger, the man who has held the world freefall altitude record since 1960. Felix and Joe will also be joined by Art Thompson, Technical Project Director of Red Bull Stratos, who heads up the team of scientists, meteorologists and engineers who have spent five years developing the project.
On March 15th, Felix successfully completed a test flight to an altitude of 71,581 ft. in a capsule attached to a helium balloon. After a 90-minute ascent he stepped off the platform, and proceeded to freefall for three minutes and 33 seconds, reaching a top speed of 364.4mph, before deploying his parachute at 7,890 ft. above sea level. Just over four minutes later, he landed safely 30 miles away from the original launch site in Roswell.
The test flight represents a major landmark for the project, marking the first time that the manned Red Bull Stratos capsule has crossed the Armstrong Line (approximately 62,000ft.), where low atmospheric pressure causes liquid to boil in the unprotected human body. It has also enabled Felix to freefall from more than twice the height of his previous personal best of 30,000 ft. whilst experiencing stratospheric conditions similar to those he is likely to experience when he makes the final record attempt.
Felix’s world record attempt will take place in Roswell, New Mexico and is currently scheduled to launch in the summer of 2012.
by editor | May 17, 2012 | Lifestyle
Stars of ‘The Avengers’ celebrate imagination at their New York Premiere
Stars from the summer’s most hotly anticipated film celebrated imagination at the New York premiere of ‘The Avengers’.
Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Cobie Smulders and Tom Hiddleston reflected on their experience of making the film and bringing the comic book series to the big screen.
Bombay Sapphire announces the launch of their Imagination Series Filmmakers Competition at Tribeca Film Festival this week, hosting the exclusive after-parties of Emily Blunt’s ‘Your Sister’s Sister’, Chris Rock’s ‘2 Days In New York’ and the closing premiere, summer blockbuster ‘The Avengers’.
To celebrate filmmakers around the world, Bombay Sapphire, in association with Tribeca Film Festival, is offering budding filmmakers the chance to make their own short film, using their imagination to interpret Oscar-winner Geoffrey Fletcher’s short film script.
Oscar-winning scriptwriter Geoffrey Fletcher today announces a new competition to find a rising star in filmmaking to bring his script to life.
From the 26th of April, budding filmmakers can view the script at www.imaginationseries.com and can submit their interpretation of the Geoffrey’s script on this site from the 8th of May 2012. A global judging panel, including Geoffrey Fletcher and industry leaders put together by the Tribeca Film Festival, will select five winners from a shortlist of entries who will then go on to produce and direct their own individual films and view these at a star-studded international premiere early 2013.
For more information visit www.bombaysapphire.com | www.facebook.com/BombaySapphire
by editor | May 10, 2012 | Lifestyle
TAKE ME “AS IS”
On her 50th wedding anniversary, a woman revealed the secret of her
long and happy marriage. She said, “On my wedding day, I decided to
make a list of ten of my husband’s faults which, for the sake of the
marriage, I would overlook.”
One of her guests asked her what some of the faults she chose to
overlook were. “To tell you the truth,” she replied, “I never did
get around to making that list. But whenever my husband did
something that made me hopping mad, I would say to myself, ‘Lucky
for him that’s one of the ten!’”
It’s nice to decide what to overlook. In relationships, I get plenty
of practice overlooking the foibles of other people. And I suspect
they get plenty of practice with me, too.
As they hung wallpaper together, one husband became frustrated with
his wife. She seemed, to him, to be indifferent about the quality of
her work. He felt she was doing a poor job. He finally put it into
words this way: “The problem is that I’m a perfectionist and you’re
not.”
“Exactly!” she replied. “That’s why you married me and I married
you!”
Miss Perfect certainly did one thing well. She knew how to overlook
annoying observations from her perfectionist husband.
We human beings are nothing if not flawed and imperfect. But, the
point is, people are not meant to without blemish. We’re scraped and
scarred, flawed on the inside and marred on outside. It’s just the
way we are. (Sometimes I think it’s one of our more endearing
qualities.) I never want to forget that “perfect” is only found in
the dictionary.
Even pottery may be closer to perfection than we humans, if Belleek
Pottery in Ireland is any example. I hear that every finished piece
there undergoes a final inspection. It is held up to a fierce,
bright light and examined for imperfections. If even the slightest
flaw is detected, the cup or plate or vase or sugar bowl is smashed
to pieces. That’s right. The blemished piece is never sold as a
“second.” If Belleek pottery is not flawless, it is reckoned to be
no good at all. No doubt other makers of fine china and crystal
operate the same way.
I surely cannot stand up to that kind of scrutiny. I have flaws I
haven’t even begun to explore yet.
How much pain prompted the words of that sensitive artist Vincent
van Gogh when he lamented, “I wish they would only take me as I am.”
How many times a day are those words repeated by countless people
feeling the sting of rejection? To be accepted as one is and not
discarded as useless is more than just a wish, it is a deep, human
need.
All of us sport an invisible sign around our necks — “AS IS.” It
means, take me as I am. I may not become what you want me to be. And
I’m far, far from perfect. But I have some great qualities, too, as
well as my share of faults. You will have to take me “AS IS” and
I’ll take you that way, too.
AS IS will be the best guarantee any of us can offer. But quite
frankly, most of the time we’re getting a pretty good deal.
– Steve Goodier
__________
Find Steve Goodier here: http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/.
Newsletter: http://LifeSupportSystem.com.
by editor | May 10, 2012 | Lifestyle
Online dating… the whole concept sounds very exciting yet
mysterious.
There are people around the world who have done the online dating
thing, many of which were able to find their soulmates.
Most of us have dated at least offline, and some of us have dated
online. Either way, online dating can be a good experience for
each one of us – if we don’t let the bad outshine the good.
It has been said that risk is required to attain great reward.
And after having heard some of the stories about the online
dating experience, you just about have to concede that sometimes
online dating brings with it great risk. Well, everything in this
world involves some drawbacks and dangers with it and so does
online dating.
Where there are good people, there may also be bad people. It is
a risk we all take when we choose to socialize with others.
The greatest risk of online dating is that the person with whom
you are speaking is not who he or she says that they are. Of
course, that could happen in the real world of dating, but it is
not as prevelent as it is online.
The people who are faking their online identity fall into one of
three groups: lonely people, married people (sometimes also
lonely married people), and the criminal element.
Ladies, don’t think that a reference to the criminal element
only includes men who seek to harm women. More so, most of the
criminal element in the online dating world are those who are
looking for a mark for an identity fraud or money scam. Whether
you are a man or woman, you should be forewarned that if someone
starts asking for money to pay for some emergency expense, then
you are probably talking to a criminal involved in some sort of
money scam. You know, it might be different if you have met this
individual in person, but if you have never met them and they are
asking for money… BEWARE!
Faking an online identity on a dating website is not always
indicative of a fraudulent mind. When lonely, some people simply
create an online identity that might be more exciting and more
attractive to others. This kind of fake may not hurt you
physically or financially, but it may very well put a long-term
relationship on the rocks as the deceptions are discovered.
By far, the most common reason for faking an online dating
website identity is the ignorant spouse at home. He or she might
be a wretch, but being a wretch does not make them dangerous.
The online dating websites have gotten pretty good over the years
at setting up systems to identify and target the criminal
elements within the dating site. Typically, the male or female
criminal scammer will be identified and deleted from the dating
websites’ database within 24-48 hours. So, if you find yourself
talking to someone and their profile is shown to be deleted in
mid-sentence, you can usually rest assured that the online dating
site just saved you a world of headache and heartache.
While the dating websites are good at detecting and deleting the
criminal scammers from the dating community, the dating websites
are less inclined to eliminate the married members from their
database. However, some of the bigger dating websites have
provided mechanisms for members to prove that they are who they
say they are, for the purpose of giving the website a method to
tell its other members whether the individual has submitted proof
of identity to them or not. The married guys and gals usually
won’t go through the proof of identity process, for fear that
his or her significant other will find out about the attempt to
cheat.
But before you go jumping to any conclusions about an individual
on an online dating website, keep in mind that many people simply
will not go through the identity verification process, for a
number of reasons:
1. Too much hassle;
2. It sometimes costs money; and
3. Some people are afraid to give private data to some unknown
third-party that might be operating the website.
The truth is that the online dating community should be treated
as a buyer-beware process. While most people who frequent the
online dating websites are honest, single and looking for love,
there are a few out there who are not.
If you gather a group of people in any single setting, whether it
is an online dating website, a church, or a grocery store, most
of the people you will find at that setting are good, honest,
hard-working people. So, when you are online, you should look at
the online dating experience as one where most people will be
above-board, honest, and sincere. But you should also keep in the
back of your mind that you do not know for sure what you are
getting until which time you are able to prove to yourself that
the person at the other end of the conversation is exactly who
you believe that they are.
When searching for that proof of sincerity, keep in mind that
lesson from our youth… Liars will never be able to keep their
lies straight, and they will always begin to make mistakes and
let the truth slip out.
At the end of the day, the online dating community is just one
more way for people to meet a potential love interest. It is a
way where you can meet people that you would not have been able
to meet otherwise, and who knows, it might work out to be the
best love connection you will ever make.
———————————————————————
Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. Our no-strings-attached dating site has become a popular
online adult dating destination, due to its large membership
base of people looking for relationships of all kinds. Learn
more at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/
by editor | May 8, 2012 | Lifestyle
How To Create A Successful Professional Speaker Website
There are thousands of people who are or want to be professional speakers. You
have so much competition that you have to be creative in how to differentiate
yourself. One way of doing this is by making a great first impression with your
website.
Speaker bureaus and meeting planners often book a speaker after looking at their
website so there is an expectation that a speaker website be sophisticated and
complete. Following is a list of what every speaker website must include:
* Home Page ? This page should have your best photo, your most impressive
testimonial and emphasize what makes you different from other speakers. What
can you offer that no one else can or what?s your unique angle or perspective?
* Biography ? Include all of your professional experience including what you
accomplished before you became a speaker.
* Services ? Even though you think that people can tell you are a speaker tell
them again anyway. Let them know if you offer keynotes, workshops,
facilitation, etc.
* Topics ? On this page less is more. Don’t try to offer a topic to please
everyone. Only offer topics within your specialty.
* Client List ? Include this even if your client list is short. You may include
both paid and unpaid engagements. Make note of clients with repeat engagements
to build your credibility.
* Testimonials ? Don’t hide these on a page on your site. Add them to every
page and ask clients for video testimonials whenever possible.
* Video ? If you want to get booked you need a video. Try calling local
organizations and offer to speak for free in return for bringing a camera crew.
Link to your video from every page of the site.
* Pictures ? You should offer both high resolution and low resolution head shots
for both web and print use.
* Logistics ? Let potential clients know how you travel and what technical
requirements you may have.
* Content ? Show off your expertise with free articles, a blog or regular social
media updates that stream to your website.
* Lead Capture ? Ask people to register for your e-zine or blog updates so you
can keep in touch.
* Social media ? Display all of your social media site icons with links to your
profile.
* Contact Information ? This should be on a page by itself with a contact form
and then on every page at the top or bottom.
This list is a great starting point to satisfy meeting planners and potential
clients but the most important point you should remember is to differentiate
yourself from the thousands of professional speakers who are competing for the
same speaking engagements as you.
© 2012. Davis Virtual Assistance. Reprints welcome so long as the article and
byline are reprinted intact with all links made live.
Bonnie Jo Davis is a Virtual Assistant who has been working with professional
speakers and other clients since 1995. She offers administrative,
organizational and marketing services to clients from all industries. For more
information visit http:
by editor | May 8, 2012 | Lifestyle
A CHANGE OF PACE
According to a Greek legend, in ancient Athens a man noticed the
great storyteller Aesop playing childish games with some little
boys. He laughed and jeered at Aesop, asking him why he wasted his
time in such frivolous activity.
Aesop responded by picking up a bow, loosening its string, and
placing it on the ground. Then he said to the critical man, “Now,
answer the riddle, if you can. Tell us what the unstrung bow
implies.”
The man looked at it for several moments but had no idea what point
Aesop was trying to make. The moralist explained, “If you keep a bow
always bent, it will break eventually; but if you let it go slack, it will
be
more fit for use when you want it.”
So it is with us. Our minds and bodies are like the bow. When
constantly under pressures of everyday life, we can eventually
break. We need to loosen up; we need time to take the pressure off
and relax. For some, that may mean time off to rest and recreate.
For some, it may mean Sabbath. It is no wonder that observing the
Sabbath in Judeo-Christian tradition is a commandment, not a
suggestion.
Have you heard the funny story of the woman who needed a few days
off from work, but knew the boss wasn’t likely to give her leave?
She thought that maybe if she acted “crazy,” then he would tell her
to go home for a while. So, she hung upside-down from the ceiling
and made funny noises.
Her co-worker asked her what she was doing. She said that she was
pretending to be a light bulb so the boss might think she desperately
needed of a few days off.
Her plan worked beautifully. A few minutes later, the boss heard the
commotion and came into the office. “Oh, my!” he exclaimed. “What in
the world are you doing?” She explained that she was a light bulb
and he told her to go home immediately and rest for a few days.
As she walked out of the office, her co-worker followed close
behind. Their boss called, “And where do you think you’re going?”
“I’m going home, too,” she said. “I can’t work in the dark.”
I suppose we all have our ways of getting our needs met. And one of
the things we all need, especially those of us in stressful
environments, is real down time.
Former baseball pitcher Dutch Leonard might have put it a little
differently. He once said that the secret of great pitching is not
speed or the ability to throw curves. It’s the “change of pace.” The
average batter will soon learn to hit a pitcher who continually
throws the same kind of pitch. But it’s hard to hit against a
pitcher who changes the pace of delivery. That change of pace gives
a pitcher the edge over the best of batters.
A change of pace likewise gives us an edge in life. Taking time to
watch the clouds, enjoy a breeze, take a walk, read or just slow
down is necessary if we are to be our best later. And for me, a
regular day of rest is as important as regular sleep. It’s a way of
taking the pressure off.
To be my best, I need to be sure to change my pace. It is usually
just the change I need.
– Steve Goodier
__________
Find Steve Goodier here: http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/.
Newsletter: http://LifeSupportSystem.com.
by editor | May 5, 2012 | Lifestyle
my-wardrobe.com presents the launch of its
my-wardrobe.com, the premier online destination for real men’s style presents its biggest ever line up of footwear product and information.
What: The Shoe Library ?When: Friday May 4?Where: my-wardrobe.com??my-wardrobe has compiled its largest-ever edit of men’s footwear for Summer 2012 to fill the shelves of its brand new, bigger-than-ever footwear department. ??Called The Shoe Library, this extensive collection of product and information is designed to bring you the key styles and best brands available in the menswear universe and all the knowledge and styling information you need to successfully shop for any occasion.??The line-up of product includes new brands from New Balance and Converse to the template-defining loafer label Bass Weejuns and heritage Brit brand Clarks Originals. London favourite b-Store injects its sleek trend-driven classics while summer ready retro styles come from Riviera’s and Fin’s hand-made suede moccasins. ??Exclusive products come from Superga, b-Store and Grenson while head of menswear buying Lee Douros has teamed up with Northampton traditionalists Tricker’s and Sanders to update their heritage rich styles.??Douros says: “I’m extremely excited about the addition of the Shoe Library to my-wardrobe.com. It is a real insight into the process of shoe-making and we have worked with some of the best brands to bring you exclusive styles to herald its launch.”
Visitors to the Shoe Library’s experience-rich design will be able to look up all the facts they need to know (and a few they don’t) in the extensive glossary, interact with the graphical examination of footwear anatomy, and answer their questions in the FAQ department. ??A Style Guide collates the key footwear solutions for a range of looks from trousers to chinos, smart and casual denim, shorts and sweats.??The my-wardrobe shoe library truly is an at a glance checklist of everything that goes into your shoes – apart from your feet that is. ??LAUNCHING TOMORROW FRIDAY MAY 4 @ MIDDAY
by editor | May 2, 2012 | Lifestyle
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by editor | Apr 29, 2012 | Lifestyle
One mother was jogging through the park, pushing two toddlers in a
stroller. As they approached a hill, she said, “OK, now I need you
to help me.” And they did! As she started up the hill, they each
said, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. . .”
Sometimes it just takes the desire to help and you can find a way.
One person known for his desire to help was Fiorello LaGuardia.
LaGuardia was mayor of New York City during the worst days of the
Great Depression and all of WWII. He was adored by many New Yorkers
who took to calling him the “Little Flower,” because of his name and
the fact that he was so short and always wore a carnation in his
lapel.
In many ways, LaGuardia was bigger than life – he rode the New York
City fire trucks, raided city “speakeasies” with the police
department, took entire orphanages to baseball games and, when the
New York newspapers went on strike, he got on the radio and read the
Sunday funnies to the kids.
One bitterly cold night in January of 1935, the mayor turned up at a
night court that served the poorest ward of the city. LaGuardia
dismissed the judge for the evening and took over the bench himself.
Within a few minutes, a tattered old woman was brought before him,
charged with stealing a loaf of bread. She told LaGuardia that her
daughter’s husband had deserted her, her daughter was sick, and her
two grandchildren were starving.
But the shopkeeper, from whom the bread was stolen, refused to drop
the charges. “It’s a real bad neighborhood, Your Honor,” the man
told the mayor. “She’s got to be punished to teach other people
around here a lesson.”
LaGuardia sighed. He turned to the woman and said, “I’ve got to
punish you. The law makes no exceptions. Ten dollars or ten days in
jail.” But even as he pronounced sentence, the mayor was already
reaching into his pocket. He extracted a bill and tossed it into his
famous hat, saying, “Here is the ten dollar fine which I now remit;
and furthermore, I am going to fine everyone in this courtroom fifty
cents for living in a town where a person has to steal bread so that
her grandchildren can eat. Mr. Bailiff, collect the fines and give
them to the defendant.”
The following day, New York City newspapers reported that $47.50 was
turned over to a bewildered woman who had stolen a loaf of bread to
feed her starving grandchildren. Fifty cents of that amount was
contributed by the grocery store owner himself, while some seventy
petty criminals, people with traffic violations, and New York City
policemen, each of whom had just paid fifty cents for the privilege
of doing so, gave the mayor a standing ovation.
Sometimes it just takes the desire to help and you can find a way.
Someone beautifully said, “Sympathy sees and says, ‘I’m sorry.’
Compassion sees and says, ‘I’ll help.’” When we learn the
difference, we will make a difference.
– Steve Goodier
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Find Steve Goodier here: http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/.
Newsletter: http://LifeSupportSystem.com .
