Online dating… the whole concept sounds very exciting yet
mysterious.
There are people around the world who have done the online dating
thing, many of which were able to find their soulmates.
Most of us have dated at least offline, and some of us have dated
online. Either way, online dating can be a good experience for
each one of us – if we don’t let the bad outshine the good.
It has been said that risk is required to attain great reward.
And after having heard some of the stories about the online
dating experience, you just about have to concede that sometimes
online dating brings with it great risk. Well, everything in this
world involves some drawbacks and dangers with it and so does
online dating.
Where there are good people, there may also be bad people. It is
a risk we all take when we choose to socialize with others.
The greatest risk of online dating is that the person with whom
you are speaking is not who he or she says that they are. Of
course, that could happen in the real world of dating, but it is
not as prevelent as it is online.
The people who are faking their online identity fall into one of
three groups: lonely people, married people (sometimes also
lonely married people), and the criminal element.
Ladies, don’t think that a reference to the criminal element
only includes men who seek to harm women. More so, most of the
criminal element in the online dating world are those who are
looking for a mark for an identity fraud or money scam. Whether
you are a man or woman, you should be forewarned that if someone
starts asking for money to pay for some emergency expense, then
you are probably talking to a criminal involved in some sort of
money scam. You know, it might be different if you have met this
individual in person, but if you have never met them and they are
asking for money… BEWARE!
Faking an online identity on a dating website is not always
indicative of a fraudulent mind. When lonely, some people simply
create an online identity that might be more exciting and more
attractive to others. This kind of fake may not hurt you
physically or financially, but it may very well put a long-term
relationship on the rocks as the deceptions are discovered.
By far, the most common reason for faking an online dating
website identity is the ignorant spouse at home. He or she might
be a wretch, but being a wretch does not make them dangerous.
The online dating websites have gotten pretty good over the years
at setting up systems to identify and target the criminal
elements within the dating site. Typically, the male or female
criminal scammer will be identified and deleted from the dating
websites’ database within 24-48 hours. So, if you find yourself
talking to someone and their profile is shown to be deleted in
mid-sentence, you can usually rest assured that the online dating
site just saved you a world of headache and heartache.
While the dating websites are good at detecting and deleting the
criminal scammers from the dating community, the dating websites
are less inclined to eliminate the married members from their
database. However, some of the bigger dating websites have
provided mechanisms for members to prove that they are who they
say they are, for the purpose of giving the website a method to
tell its other members whether the individual has submitted proof
of identity to them or not. The married guys and gals usually
won’t go through the proof of identity process, for fear that
his or her significant other will find out about the attempt to
cheat.
But before you go jumping to any conclusions about an individual
on an online dating website, keep in mind that many people simply
will not go through the identity verification process, for a
number of reasons:
1. Too much hassle;
2. It sometimes costs money; and
3. Some people are afraid to give private data to some unknown
third-party that might be operating the website.
The truth is that the online dating community should be treated
as a buyer-beware process. While most people who frequent the
online dating websites are honest, single and looking for love,
there are a few out there who are not.
If you gather a group of people in any single setting, whether it
is an online dating website, a church, or a grocery store, most
of the people you will find at that setting are good, honest,
hard-working people. So, when you are online, you should look at
the online dating experience as one where most people will be
above-board, honest, and sincere. But you should also keep in the
back of your mind that you do not know for sure what you are
getting until which time you are able to prove to yourself that
the person at the other end of the conversation is exactly who
you believe that they are.
When searching for that proof of sincerity, keep in mind that
lesson from our youth… Liars will never be able to keep their
lies straight, and they will always begin to make mistakes and
let the truth slip out.
At the end of the day, the online dating community is just one
more way for people to meet a potential love interest. It is a
way where you can meet people that you would not have been able
to meet otherwise, and who knows, it might work out to be the
best love connection you will ever make.
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Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online
dating. Our no-strings-attached dating site has become a popular
online adult dating destination, due to its large membership
base of people looking for relationships of all kinds. Learn
more at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Consider Lance’s new Kindle book, “Making Memories: Creative
Dating Ideas”: http://raintreepublishing.com/creative-dating-ideas/